I won’t be there on your first day at school

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48 Responses

  1. Oh my goodness this nearly made me cry! I know exactly what you mean, often if both of us drop Zach off he is double unhappy. It’s so brave of you for making this decision but I know that you know it’s completely right for your daughter. Hope you are ok on the day lovely xxx

    • stoppingattwo says:

      Thanks Lisa. I will be the mum who isn’t there on the first day, but I need to stop worrying about what other people will think of me, and just do what is best for Freyja. Thank you x

  2. I think you’ve made an incredibly brave and selfless decision. You’ve made it based on Freya’s needs not yours and that’s absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, or something to regret. I have no idea who took me in for my first day at school and I can’t even remember too much about it! Our youngest is starting on Monday – it’s such a milestone isn’t it?

  3. Katie says:

    All families are different love. If this is what is best for you all then it is the right way to do it, I know the mummy guilt can lay heavily on us at times like this, but don’t let anyone tell you differently or make you feel bad! She has two parents after all and who made the rule that mummy had to be the one to be there on the first day of school? Nobody would bat an eyelid if daddy missed it. As long as someone is there who she loves and trusts, that is all that will matter to Freyja. You can still share her excitement when she tells you all about it from her point of view later xxx

  4. Oh I hope it all goes ok. Must be hard for you but it does sound right. Kids are so into their routines and changing things about can really rock the boat. You are putting her first and that is all that matters. Good luck! xx #sundaystars

  5. I nearly cryed!!!! Very sweet!!!!x

  6. Oh wow this made me well up! You are being so selfless and putting her before your own wants and needs to be there for such a big milestone. Very admirable ๐Ÿ™‚ #sundaystars

  7. Good for you for being so selfless. I’m a teacher and always feel for the parents on the first day. Usually the kids overcome and upset quickly as they get stuck into something but I always wonder if the parents at home have any distractions or if they’re diluting cups of tea at home with their tears.


    • stoppingattwo says:

      What you are saying is like how Freyja was at nursery – upset until she got distracted. Sure it will be the same for her school start

  8. Lara says:

    A difficult decision! I hope everything goes okay. I’m sure it will x #sundaystars

  9. You’ve made me cry this morning lovely Karen. This is totally the right decision for your family so don’t second guess yourself. You are a wonderful Mother and Daddies are just as capable as taking their big girls to school. You’ll get to do the de-brief later that day and be there for all those wonderful holidays. #sundaystars

  10. This is such a lovely post. You are being selfless and it is the best thing for your girl. Well done for being a fab mamma xxx #sundaystars

  11. Chloe says:

    oh my I welled up. This is so emotional. What a difficult decisions to make! We are the same in our household, Daddy drops Evie to nursery and last week when I had to drop her off she screamed as I left and clutched onto me. We both ended up sitting on the floor sobbing into each others arms and when I finally peeled her off me I cried the whole way home. Daddy will be back taking her this week because I think it’s right for us that we stick to routine and it’s not fair that I upset her so much. You’re going to be so gutted you’re not there to see her off (just like I am with nursery every week) but I think it’s so beautiful that she’s got a little daddy/daughter moment too. I hope everything goes ok and she loves her first day x #sundaystars

  12. Oh, not an easy decision but sounds like you’ve made exactly the right one for you and your little girl. It’s not easy being a mamma! #sundaystars

  13. Catie says:

    Hurray for putting your child’s needs before your own. This must have been a very difficult decision. I
    Couldn’t be there because of work but afterwards realised he was better off going with grandpa for the same reason and it worked!

  14. That must have been such a hard decision. It sounds like you have totally made the right choice for your family xx

  15. Nicola says:

    Makes perfect sense why you wouldn’t want to upset your little girl’s routine, and you’ll all be happier for it, I’m sure. Good luck to Freyja on her first day ๐Ÿ™‚ I found you via #SundayStars, thanks for hosting! ๐Ÿ™‚

  16. Mummy Tries says:

    That must have been such a tough decision to make, really hope you’re ok come next week! Best of luck to Freyja starting big girl school xx

  17. When it comes to childcare, I’ve always been the dropper offer (it’s a word!!) and Andrew’s always been the one doing the picking up, most of the time. But when it comes to school I think it’ll be different. I work three days a week at the moment and if that stays the same then I suppose grandparents will be roped in too, as Andrew starts work at 8 – ruling him out – and I won’t be able to cover every morning. I think that might make settling quite difficult if she’s never sure who is dropping her off or picking her up on any given day. I wish I could provide more stability but I just can’t.

    Lots of food for thought! Thanks for sharing. x

  18. That must be a really difficult decision to make, because we always want to be there for our little ones, if not every time, but at least on their big milestones. Hope she’ll get on well and settle in quick! #SundayStars

  19. As she gets more used to going, dropoffs should get easier, no matter which parent is involved. Sorry that you’ve had a hard time with this. Hope she has a great day!

  20. Silly Mummy says:

    Lovely post. Sounds like a very sensible, though difficult, decision, and right for Freya. We find the same sort of thing with our toddler – she needs the routines. Daddy usually puts her to bed at night, and she sometimes gets upset or misbehaves if I do it, because that throws off the routine – mummy does bedtime during the day, not at night! I’m sure keeping her routine will help her adjust to the changes. Hope she has a lovely day. #sundaystars

  21. Ok this is the second blog I’ve read in the last hour that has made me well up! A difficult decision but good on you for sticking to routine and thinking of your little girl xx #sundaystars

  22. Ahhh bless you! She will be just fine, and you will get to do many school runs over the years I bet. Big hugs and love – Jess xx


  23. Emma's Mamma says:

    Oh this is beautiful! I completely understand your reasoning and respect you for it. It must have been such a hard decision to make. Hope she has a great first day at school! x #SundayStars

  24. oh Karen that must of been such a tough decision to make, I completely understood why you have chosen not to do the drop off and I am sure Freyja will know that too such a selfless choice to make I hope she settles in quickly at school and has a great day #sundaystars

  25. That is a very brave and selfless decision. My little girl starts preschool in just over a week, and I know that it is going to be tough. I’m hoping that my husband can come on her first day as she (and I) will find it easier that way. I completely understand your decision, and I think that you’re doing the right thing x

  26. Oh doesn’t Freyja look gorgeous and grown up in her new uniform though! You know, I really don’t think she will remember her first day and you are right to make a decision which will mean she is at her most relaxed on that first morning. You can hear all about it at tea time! Good luck! xxx

  27. This is a lovely post, and I think what you are doing shows true selflessness. Routine is important to children and I think sticking to the parts you can during a period of change is really important. Thanks for hosting #sundaystars

  28. Jenny says:

    As others have said it is definitely selfless to do what’s right for your daughter and stick to her routine, no matter if you would really like to be there. I’m sure daddy will do a great job and she’ll be happy. ๐Ÿ™‚ x

  29. Oh lovely, this motherhood guilt never quite leaves us does it? But you know you should be very proud of your decision, you’re putting your daughter’s needs first and that my love, is the epitome of being a doting and loving mum. We can only ever do our best, at any time can’t we? A tough decision to make no doubt, but I’m sure it’s the right one for you all. Best of luck for next week! xxx #SundayStars

  30. Cat says:

    Ooh you are a brave woman, and for all of the right reasons. Putting your daughter first when it means a sacrifice for yourself is totally selfless, yet what real, dedicated parenting is all about. Well done. If I did this to Matt he would dread the phone call afterwards as I would want EVERY single detail!


    • stoppingattwo says:

      Thank you!
      Drop off went well. Rich has a lovely photo of her stood outside her school in her uniform – looking forward to hearing all about how she got on later….

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